I think that movie stays in B territory because of the gods versus man theme is too cerebral and not emotional.  If the majority of the movie took place on Mount Olympus and we got to know and like all the gods, the danger Hades poses would feel more visceral.  Perseus’ quest for vengeance is emotional, but it gets muddled with his discovery he is Zeus’ son.  He goes from fisherman to hero too quickly.  Even though he is fighting had his friends are dying, his victories feel too easy.  He never questions what he is doing or doubts that he can accomplish his goal.  Moments of doubt or seeing any emotions from him at all would go a long way to elevate the story.  The most powerful moment in the movie is his grief when Io is dying.  I wish we had seen more glimpses of what was going on beneath his steely exterior. 

There’s nothing wrong with making a corny, campy movie if you know that’s what you’re doing.  CLASH takes itself a bit too seriously and ends up being silly.  The audience is not sure if the filmmakers are in on the joke.  For my part, my favorite retelling of the Greek myths is the HERCULES television series from the ‘90s.  It was self-aware, funny with great action.  You can’t beat Aphrodite depicted as a California surfer girl.

It is very difficult to build a movie around a depressed character, especially a mainstream movie.  Dealing with the darkness of depression has a more indie feel like LEAVING LAS VEGAS.  I’m not suggesting that characters can’t be sad and troubled – that’s what makes great conflict.  But think twice about making your protagonist so depressed that she is almost non-functioning like Bella.  Find a way to make the heartache interesting visually and to keep the tension going.  The pacing was almost non-existent in NEW MOON, making for a very long two hours. 

Despite these problems, judging by the screams in my theater and the boffo boxoffice, the Twilighters were ecstatic.  The writer and director gave them just what they wanted – a faithful recreation of the book with all of its pitfalls.

Let’s take a look at a few examples.  In ALIENS Ripley (Sigourney Weaver) is fighting to save a little girl.  In the Bourne movies Jason Bourne (Matt Damon) is figuring out who he is and why people want to kill him.  In RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK Indy (Harrison Ford) is fighting the Nazis and reuniting with his lost love, Marion (Karen Allen).  However, in THE KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL, the emotional story is less clear.   Indy is fighting the Russians this time, who are not as scary as the Nazis.  While he is once again reuniting with his lost love Marion, there is no romantic tension between them.  His relationship with Mutt (Shia LaBeouf) is equally underdeveloped.   Consequently, we don’t care when these three characters are in jeopardy. 

In addition to engaging the characters, action sequences must further the plot.  While this may seem like a no-brainer, I read lots of scripts full of action sequences where nothing happens.  Bullets are flying, but the plot is not advancing.  The hero is not gaining or losing ground.  This was another problem in THE KINDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL.  What exactly was going on in that long chase sequence in the jungle with the jeeps and vines?  In the end the heroes escaped death, but were no better or worse off than they were before. 

When writing action, make sure that something happens in each action sequence.  In addition to cool effects and big explosions, action should advance the plot and have an emotional component.  Compelling action will make your script stand out from the pack.

I think the movie would have been much stronger if not every couple finished the retreat successfully.  COUPLES RETREAT wants to be a fun exploration of the pros and cons of marriage.  Dave is the emotional heart of the movie.  He has several wonderful speeches where he talks about how much he loves his wife and wants to be married.  It would have been a more powerful movie if the humor were darker and more extreme as each couple explored their point of view of marriage, love, & fidelity.   I think that COUPLES RETREAT is a dark comedy trying to be a romantic comedy.  I enjoyed this movie, but it got mixed reviews.  I think that the tonal shifts were the problem.  Remember not every comedy about romance is a romantic comedy.  When you have a great idea like a comedy set at a couples retreat, let the idea determine the genre instead of trying to force it into one.

Reviews are arbitrary.  It can be very frustrating if you feel that someone’s criticism was unfair.  In our world of instant access, it’s easy to contact the author, either by email or post.  Before you dash off a hurried, angry response, I urge you to stop and think.  Hollywood is a small town.  You have no idea who this person is connected to or where they will be working three months from now.  Imagine walking into a pitch and finding out the exec is someone you had a nasty email exchange with months before.  You’ve already shown her how you take criticism.  There is no way she will want to work with you.  Writing an email or a comment may feel safe and anonymous, but they’re not.  Emails can be forwarded, quickly making the rounds.  Comments are not unidentifiable either.  You have to give your email (even though it’s not published) when you log in to comment.  Also, if someone knows your internet handle, they can Google it and all the comments you have made all over the web will come up. 

If you decide to reach out, instead of telling the reviewer how they are wrong or defending yourself, make the exchange about creating a relationship.  Share an anecdote about writing the screenplay or shooting the movie.  Reporters and bloggers are hungry for material.  Contact with the screenwriter will give them a leg up on everybody else.  Perhaps they will repost or ask you to write a guest post, giving you more positive exposure.  Give them the scoop on your next project.  Use them to create buzz.  Now that you are having a conversation instead of haranguing, if you need them to correct something in one of their stories, they will be more likely to.

Some executives give you written notes before the meeting.  This is ideal as you have time to digest them and craft a response.  However, often writers hear the notes for the first time in the room.  Resist the urge to counter everything.  Spend more time listening and taking notes than talking.  If you feel like you need time to process everything before you respond, ask for another meeting.  Finally, to make sure that everyone is on the same page someone should write a memo stating what was agreed on.  This prevents any miscommunications.  Also, it is helpful to have as a reference when you turn in a new draft.  You’d be surprised how often executives can’t remember what they asked the writer to do.  If the exec or your producer doesn’t write the end of meeting memo, you should.  Yes, you’re doing their job for them, but it’s to make your life easier.  And they’ll love you for being so organized.

Managing your relationship with the execs and producers is important if you want to stay on the project.  Writers are always the first to go when there are creative differences.  If you don’t agree with the director and the studio’s vision, you’re gone.  Again, it’s up to you.  You must decide what story points are worth fighting for to the point of walking away.  Often writers are proved right.  The producer hires another writer.  They go through a round of drafts and then end up hiring the original writer to write what he was pitching.  This constant treadmill of notes and drafts can be exhausting.  It is helpful for writers’ sanity if they are working on specs as well.  Here they have complete control over their story, until they sell it and the whole process starts again.

Being able to handle feedback and collaborate is crucial to a career in the film industry.  Everybody from studio executives, to agents, to directors and actors is getting constant response to their ideas and creativity.  Without input from other people there is no way to know what you are doing right, what you’re doing wrong, and how to improve it.  Jack Canfield has a whole chapter in his book THE SUCCESS PRINCIPLES that discusses how the most successful people in all sorts of fields use feedback.   The secret is being open enough to learn from it.  What I’m talking about here is constructive criticism, comments that are made to improve the work.

That is the goal of story notes, to make the script better.  Good enough to sell and great enough to get a green light.  That is everyone wants, to make a movie.  Hopefully you are working with brilliantly insightful executives, producers, actors, and directors.  Unfortunately, that is not always the case.  Many studio executives have no vision of the movie they want to make.  It is safer for them to keep giving reams of notes, rather than risk their job by recommending a green light.  Often directors’ vision of the movie differs from what you have written.  Actors usually approach the story from their character without given thought to your carefully crafted structure and subtext.  How do you navigate all of these conflicting ideas and agendas and keep some remnants of your original story?  With two very important attitudes.  You must be flexible and cheerful. 

Flexibility is important because story notes and meetings are all about making changes.  No writer has ever shown up at a notes meeting and been told we love it; don’t change a word.  Before you go into the development process, decide what things are so integral to your story that you can’t change them.  What would kill a little piece of your creative soul to change?  Does your lead character have to be a woman?  Does your story have to take place in Montana?  Whatever they are, have intelligent, logical reasons to hold onto them in case you must explain your feelings.  Think of everything else as up for grabs.  Of course you hope they like what you wrote, but if not – oh well.  Don’t spend the meeting arguing about holding onto things.  That will get you branded as difficult.  You may get some cockamamie suggestions.  But you may get some amazing ones.  The very best notes meetings are when each idea builds on the next, so that at the end the story is better than anyone envisioned.  Go into each meeting as if it is going to be a fun, satisfying creative discussion.

Being cheerful when hearing constructive criticism insures that you are receiving the information.  In order to profit from the feedback, you have to be open to what people are telling you.  Be cheerful and engaged.  There is nothing worse than having a conversation with someone about his project who is sullen and uncommunicative.  Being cheerful also means not taking things personally.  This is harder than it sounds.  You’re alone in a room with a bunch of people criticizing your baby, most of whom have probably never written a script.  Try to have the attitude that it’s all just opinion and everyone’s opinion is valid.  An idea that rescues your project from development hell could come from the office intern or from an Oscar-winning screenwriter.  Take it all in with a smile.  Be excited to contribute.  Discuss, don’t argue.   

Taking criticism in an upbeat, flexible manner will insure that you actually hear it.  Then you must have the discernment to choose which advice to take and which to ignore.  You must balance the agenda of who’s commenting with your own goals.  For example, if you’re talking with your best friend, he won’t care if you listen to him at all.  On the other hand if your manager is giving you notes, she needs to feel heard.  You want her invested in your project so that she’ll work hard to sell it.

Finally, having a positive attitude will help your career.  These are the kinds of writers that people want to work with –  smart, fun collaborators.  Executives and producers talk to each other.  Good reputations build careers, bad ones kill them.

I think the problem is the main character Bliss (Ellen Page).  The roller derby is supposed to liberate her, but when we meet her in the first act she is completely shut down.  She is competing in beauty pageants because her mother wants her to, but Bliss’ feelings are never clear.  Has she asked to get out of them?  Is she terrified of disappointing her mother?  What is going on here?  Bliss’ best friend Pash (Alia Shawkat) is desperate to get out of Bowdeen by going to college.   Yet college is never mentioned in Bliss’ future.  She is a senior and would have already applied and be waiting to hear where she got in.  She is miserable in her small hometown, but has no plans or dreams to leave.  We never get the sense that Bliss is searching for anything so her attraction to the roller derby feels arbitrary.  This attitude is part of the reason Bliss is hard to understand and root for.

This disconnect carries over to the roller derby.  We don’t see Bliss develop strong relationships with the other girls or the coach.  This is a fascinating world with great characters, but is strangely emotionless.  We know very little about the team even though there are lots of skating scenes.  The best scene in the movie, when Maggie (Kristen Wiig) tells Bliss to give her mother another chance, is unearned because we had no idea they were that close.  Along these same lines, the team forgives Bliss very quickly for lying about her age.  This seems too easy.  We have seen no evidence that they love her that much to not be mad at her for even one second.

Finally, there was a big plot point that kept taking me out of the movie.  Bliss is seventeen, lying to everyone that she is twenty one.  At seventeen, you’re still legally a child and under the control of your parents.  She could get the team in a lot of trouble.  Furthermore, she’s having a relationship with a man in his early twenties and he could get in a lot of trouble for sleeping with an underage girl.  Bliss’ age gave the whole romance a distasteful sheen.  An easy fix for this problem would be to make her eighteen, a legal adult.  Eighteen year-olds are high school seniors.  Even better, make the story take place the summer after high school graduation so she feels fully like an adult.

In a coming of age story it is crucial for your lead character’s emotional journey to be fully developed.  An original setting is not enough.

Sometimes you can’t tell that your idea is just an idea until you have worked on it for a while.  You’ve written twenty drafts and the scripts aren’t getting any better.  Or you haven’t even made it to script.  You’re stuck in outline.  You just can’t seem to break the story.  These are tough times for a writer.  Do you keep plugging away or throw in the towel?  My advice is if you’re having this much trouble, put the project aside.  Some time away may give you clarity.  When you pick it up again, you may be in the creative flow.  Or not.  No matter what happens.  Don’t get discouraged and keep writing.  Every writer has a script or two in a drawer that didn’t work.  Each one is a learning process and the next one will be better.

Check out a great blog on this subject from the Bitter Script Reader.

http://thebitterscriptreader.blogspot.com/2009/09/sometimes-youre-gonna-lose-patient.html

There have been many biopics of Queen Elizabeth.  What made ELIZABETH unique is that we had never seen her transformation from girl to queen.  All of the other movies started when she was already the imperious Queen Elizabeth.  Elizabeth’s father Henry VIII murdered her mother, Anne Boleyn.  She grew up far from court, never expecting to be queen.    This is the girl we meet at the beginning of the film.  And she does things you would expect a young woman who has suddenly become queen to do.  She buys beautiful dresses, has lavish parties, and enjoys a romance with a dashing young man.  But the responsibility of running her country quickly become apparent.  People, English and foreign, are trying to kill her.  The country is almost broke.  Both Spain and France are nefarious enemies.  By the end of the movie Elizabeth has made hard decisions.  She has put down a rebellion and burned people at the stake.  She has given up her romance for the good of the country.  The last thing she does is put on the white make up she wears in her portraits, becoming the queen that we and history know. 

In FROST/NIXON the two men, David Frost and Richard Nixon, are both at crossroads in their lives.  Three years after resigning in the Watergate scandal, Nixon is struggling with life out of the public eye.  He is desperate to save his reputation.  Meanwhile, Frost’s career is at a standstill.  He puts up $600,000 of his own money to get an interview with Nixon.  Both men see the interviews as a way to redeem their careers.  Nixon is sure that he can outwit Fox and show America what a great president he was.  Frost is equally determined to make Nixon admit that he knew about Watergate.  Nixon is a broken man.  He can’t believe that being the most hated man in America is where he ended up after a lifetime of public service.  It is a measure of the power of Peter Morgan’s screenplay and Frank Langella’s performance, that when Nixon admits he broke the law, we feel for him.  If only he had made a thousand different decisions, he wouldn’t have ended up here.  If only…he would have been the great man and the great president he longed to be.